I’m just getting off of the phone from a very long conversation with a friend. We always have long conversations about what we want to do with our lives, where we see ourselves going, our strengths and weaknesses as people, Our Friendship.
Yes we talk about our friendship a lot. Like a growing plant, we water it, give it fertilizer, open the blinds to let the sun shine in. But sometimes the sun isn’t shining, it’s dark and dry outside, overcast, looking like it’s about to thunder. Yeah, sometimes that’s how we talk about our friendship. We both want things to improve but the question is – does talking help? Is talking a form of action?
Many pragmatic people would say no. Action is action, talking is not action. I’m undecided. If thinking is a form of action (let’s make this an assumption) and talking expresses our thinking then by transitive property, talking is a form of action? Let’s try to use an argument form:

If A(thinking)B (a form of action) & If C(Talking expresses our thinking) -> B (a form of action) if a=b and c=b then c=b

Nope. Doesn’t work, that’s called a tautological argument if I remember correctly. But I could have messed up the argument form, anyone want to help me with this?

But there are two assumptions here. And that is AB that thinking might be a form of action (admittedly the “if” says this is an assumption) and C, “that talking expresses our thinking”. Does it really? There is no such thing as perfect communication. There is no way to express all parts of our thinking in verbs, nouns, adverbs, all so contrived and loaded with meaning – in any case betraying our thoughts to be more or less than they really are. If not more or less; this way or that way, positive or negative, better or worse.

So are we really watering the plant or letting the poor thing dry out? I think communication skills are one of the most important skills a person can develop. To know oneself well and communicate that version as accurately as possible is the best way to assume control over what the person hears and interprets. But that is ceteris parabis, all things being equal, in the ideal scenario the listener does not add or subtract from what they hear, does not interpret more or less given what you have provided them to work with.

Of course this doesn’t happen. We even fool ourselves when talking, nevermind confusing others. It is a hard exercise to communicate well but it is so extremely important to learn to do it better.

(okay, in truth, talking is not a form of action but a form of distraction when you have as many deadlines as I have now.)

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